The Way YOU Love
In life's situations and circumstances, I haven't always responded in love. If I’m honest, many of my responses were immature and hurt people along the way. I always had an undeniable feeling that I needed to do better, be better, respond with grace, and be able to show love to others even if it wasn’t reciprocated.
My questions were: How do I love like you, God? How does this work?
Love and loving someone can be so simple when your feelings are on an ultimate high but what happens to love when you are off your high?
Understand that love has NO conditions.
Love says “I AM... patient, kind, truthful, protective, trusting, and helpful.” Love also says “I can put up with anything, I don’t pinpoint faults, I never give up, and I endure every situation and circumstance.”
If we’re honest, we fight with love daily.
Have you ever been hurt by a close friend, loved one, or family member? Ever been lied on, talked about, cheated on, abused, abandoned, or mistreated? When this happened to you, did you respond in love? How did you respond from that day forward?
I wrestled with displaying love because I didn’t properly forgive those who hurt me. I held on to their actions, their words, the lies, the disappointment and everything else that was attached to it. I let the agony mess with me mentally and build an empire of doubt in my head. It took a lot of prayer to release that hold on my heart and mind. I never intended to forgive because the damage was done, and I was hurt. I was creating a bigger hole and making a subconscious decision to dwell in it. I eventually realized that forgiving others FREED me from their piercing words, believing their lies, and living in a space that wouldn’t allow me to show love and be free from negative feelings. Forgiveness freed me from the enemy's deceit that he pressed upon me during my time of weakness and hurt.
Ephesian 4:4-6
There is one body, and one Spirit, just as you were called to one hope when you were called; one Lord, one faith, one baptism; one God, and Father of all, who is over all and through all and in all.
I wrestled with love in multiple areas of my life because love is 1 BODY with many PARTS. Because love is whole and has many parts, some of its parts need attention to love correctly and are hard to recognize because they are hidden until they are exposed by situations that need a response of love. Truth is your parts may require bathing, washing, and cleansing. What part(s) of you need attention to love like God? Is your love contingent upon how it makes you feel? Ephesians 4:15 tells us to speak truth in love and we will grow to become, in every respect, the mature body of Him who is the head, that is, Christ. From Him, the whole body, joined and held together by every supporting ligament, will grow and build itself up in love, as each part does it work.
So, look at love as a human body that needs all of its parts to function properly.
HEAD: Are you consciously aware of your thoughts? Your mind will guide you on deciding to love regardless of how you feel. Are you renewing your mind daily to love like God? Romans 12:2 says do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test approve what Gods will is good, pleasing and perfect will.
Is your mind renewed to love daily?
HANDS: Can you lend your hand if they never say “I’m sorry”? Can you reach out and help when you feel like it’s not deserved? Job 17:9 says the righteous will HOLD TO their ways, and those with clean hands will grow stronger? By holding on to the way of love will essentially grow you and make you stronger.
Is your hand a giving hand or is it folded?
FEET: Can you walk and be an example of God’s love? When we are caught up in the situation it’s easy for us to turn aside and follow fleshly ways but Job 23:11 says if you follow his steps closely, you will walk without turning aside? How close are you folloiwing God's steps?
Will your feet follow?
EYES: Can you see what people, things, and circumstance requires your love in order for you to walk without shackles on your feet? You have been called to live in freedom, my sisters. But, don't use freedom to satisfy your sinful nature. Instead, use your freedom to serve one another in love.
HEART: Are you aware of those hardened, resentful places in your heart?
Could you be darkened in your understanding and separated from the life of God because of the ignorance that is in them due to the hardening in your heart? (Ephesian 4:18)
Unity is broken with someone because all of your parts are not growing and building in love. Unity is broken because love is not in place. Unity is broken when we place God's characteristics on man—there’s no perfect person but there is a universe of imperfect people that God loves.Unions are broken when we expect the unexpected from people who struggle with what LOVE IS NOT. Unity is here for oneness -- not in-spite of but because of...Unity is a PRODUCT, formed and made by laboring in love. Work at humility. Work at patience. Work at forgiving. Go through long suffering. Work at not resisting change. Work at your gentleness and openness. Work on the love in unity, it is the most difficult thing to fight for and maintain. But when you have unity, guard it with LOVE ---- keep it, hold on and continue on. "Continuing is key".
As I dug deeper into those parts that had not fully developed in love, I channeled and continue to challenge myself to love differently which required me to make a change. From this day forward, I challenge you to allow certain things to happen. There will be faults, mishaps, and disappointment but you must make a conscious decision to not let it affect you negatively; forgive and love others as God loves you. I challenge you to examine and identify parts of you that need cleaning and attention.
Who are you not to love the way God loves?
Your love for others reflects your union with God. What if God broke his union with you on the account of your shortcomings? What if God broke his union with you because you have failed to forgive those who have hurt you?
DECIDE TODAY to mature in LOVE for YOU and THEM, whoever they are.
Pray this prayer:
God, I thank You for Your love, thank You for Your grace and mercy. As Your daughter, I am honored to be a part of the greatest love story ever. I thank You for understanding me, for giving me all that I need, for seeing me for who I am and still loving me, for walking and talking with me, and for keeping me close to Your heart. I want to share this same love with Your people. I want to know no color or remember any faults that will make me turn away from extending love. I am grateful to receive love from You that I did not work for and do not deserve, an everlasting love that never runs out. Your love was meant for me. Father, help me to examine parts of me that do not resemble You. I want to change. I want to freely love, and I want to be liberated from hurt, harm, shame and any kind of bondage. Renew my heart and mind. God, love me enough to deliver me from me. You said if I ask anything in Your name, you will do it. God, change me. I don't want to live in fear to love. I don't want to live with a hardened heart. Father God, I don't want to live in a place of unforgiveness. If it is not pleasing, take it out of me so that I can love the way that I should. Father, I want to love my friends, grandparents, sister, brother, mother, father, boyfriend, husband, wife, aunt, and uncle the way that I should. I forgive me for what I have done, and I forgive them for what I feel they have done -- it will not affect the way that I love, in Jesus name. God, give me faith to love again, help me to trust the process of loving freely. I may be broken now but I want to be made whole again in You. God, give me life through love. Father, I worship and honor you and all these things I pray. Amen.